Our second topic from my readers is here. It’s a very sensitive topic that I always try to avoid, but I bet it’s time I talk about this…
Ok, first of all, there are two types of baby daddies;
1. THE SUPPORTIVE BABY DADDY
2. THE DEAD BEAT BABY DADDY
so how you get to relate with your baby mama depends on what type of a baby daddy you are.
A SUPPORTIVE BABY DADDY
According to life and how times are, this specific type of a baby daddy doesn’t have to be wealthy or have lots of money to be called supportive. A supportive baby daddy is the one THAT TRULY CARES. One who tries their best. One who contributes the little he has to the growth of their baby. One who is working hard towards being stable in the future.
A supportive baby daddy tries. He has a future plan even if the present is ugly.
A DEAD BEAT BABY DADDY
this is the type that thinks simply because you carried the child in your womb then the child is your own problem. These are the type that DON’T GIVE A DAMN!!!
They don’t give a damn where their baby lives
They don’t give a damn what their baby eats
They don’t give a damn who takes their baby to the hospital when they are sick and with what money.
They don’t give a damn what their baby wears.
They don’t even remember the birthday of their child, the child’s favourite colour, the child’s progress in life and school, NOTHING BOTHERS THEM.
These are the same men who will buy alcohol but can’t buy diapers. Same same men that will have plenty of girlfriends but can’t buy food in the house.
They also have a tendency of complaining about everything.
So WHAT TYPE OF A BABY DADDY ARE YOU???
As a woman and a single parent, I know how important the role of both parents is to a child . But I also know how important PEACE, LOVE & HAPPINESS is to the growth of a child.
Most dads nowadays don’t want to stay. Most men nowadays are baby daddies and not husbands, and just fathers and not daddies, if you get what I mean.
But since that is the situation that most people have to deal with, I’d have no problem with my supportive baby daddy having another woman. Love fades at times and people have to go separate ways. But as a man, if you have your seed somewhere, just know it needs to be watered, it needs to be nurtured, it needs to be weeded.
If, my baby daddy was a supportive baby daddy, I won’t have any problem with him spending time with his baby. Or even taking his child to his parents. That won’t be a big deal at all.
And again as a baby daddy or let’s put it the right way, AS SOMEONE’S FATHER, it’s your responsibility to know what your child needs, what you can do as a dad. You also know the situation of the mother to your child, if she is employed or she is just a student, you know that well.
The best thing the two parents can do is sit down and see how they can help each other raise the child. And see how often the dad can spend time with the child, because most of the time the baby stays with the mum.
Most guys who get involved with women who have kids with other men tend to try to block the father from having a relationship with the child. I guess it’s always out of jealousy. As a woman, if you feel your baby daddy is doing enough for the child then you know the baby needs to know who their real father is. A trying father is a caring father TRUST ME. The baby needs to spend time with their father and the father needs some credit.
But I guess all this works when both of you separated on a good note and you respect each other. If both of you are trying parents, and both of you serve at the best interest of the child, then who you date is none of each other’s business. The child is your only business. And this only works when the dad is a supportive baby daddy.
Because let us be realistic, you can’t dump your seeds and let another man water them for you and help you nurture them into a full grown tree and then you want to come reap what you did not sow, it doesn’t work like that. No man in his right senses will take care of your child and be okay with you taking credit over a child you know nothing about.
Most of the times I see these post on baby daddies on kilimani mums and I feel so sad. It does not have to reach there! Both parents can agree on one thing and move on. Life is a beautiful thing and you don’t have to be sad and frustrated because you have a child with someone who is not in your life anymore.
But my take, it all starts with the man. Women have a soft spot for their babies, so you as a man, your relationship with your baby mummy will only work depending with how you treat your baby. If you are a loving and caring dad, then it’s only a mad woman who will not want their child to know that they have an amazing father. But once a woman knows how much of an a****** you are then they will work so hard to block you from their child because they don’t want their child to get some bad behaviours from their father. If you are a disrespectful man, no woman would want to be disrespected in front of their kids, because the kids will think it’s okay to disrespect mum since even dad is doing it, you know. So it’s all about the man. A good man, broke or rich is always a good man. And that is why you see some women are the bread winners in their homes but still live with the father to their children because he is a good man and the kids need that for growth. Aren’t we all trying to raise kids well so that the world can have good people?
I hope I have answered to this well without bias. I will really appreciate your comments on this. Thank you for reading. Don’t forget to like and share. Always keep it mummytreasure 👭